Avenue City R-IX

Always Learning—Together
Did your child get a technology device for a gift over the holidays? We are learning more and more about the impacts of technology on the minds of children. Our staff is committed to ongoing learning about how to best support today’s students, and we invite parents to join us in our current book study, The Anxious Generation.
The book highlights how childhood has shifted from real-world play and face-to-face interaction to smartphones and social media—changes closely linked to rising anxiety, depression, and disengagement in children and teens. While we often protect kids physically, fewer boundaries are sometimes set online.
The author calls for a shared effort: delaying smartphones and social media, creating phone-free spaces, and encouraging more independence and real-life experiences. Together, families and schools can help restore healthy development, resilience, and connection.
This is a MUST READ for every parent!

🎄 The Great ACES Christmas Countdown Chaos 🎄
Starring: every brave soul who works in an elementary school before holiday break…

It was the week before Christmas break at Avenue City School, and Superintendent Grimes had already declared that anyone who survived the next five days would automatically earn a bonus… of her deepest respect. Principal Holcumbrink had stocked his office with candy canes, ear plugs, and possibly a snow shovel for self-defense.

By 8:15 Monday morning, things had already unraveled.

The Teachers’ Trouble Begins

• Mrs. Atchity, Mrs. Bloomberg, and Mrs. Bell attempted to teach math… but their students were too busy debating whether Santa uses GPS or magic.

• Mrs. Byergo, Mrs. Williams, and Mrs. Sigrist caught two kids measuring the classroom chimney to verify “elf accessibility.”

• Mrs. Hall, Mrs. Schaeffer, and Mrs. Eiken tried a “calming holiday craft,” which lasted exactly four minutes before glitter covered the room, the hallway, and mysteriously Principal Holcumbrink’s shoes.

• Mrs. Ellis and Mrs. Farrell (with the direction of  Mrs. Wing) attempted to rehearse a simple holiday song. By the end, it had somehow turned into a dramatic opera featuring two very committed Pre-K and 4th Grade reindeer.

• Mrs. Forney, Mrs. Davis, Mrs. Zvolanek, and Mrs. Holly tried reading a sweet Christmas book… but the fire alarm went off because someone (rumor points to Mr. Phillips) burned popcorn trying to make a “holiday aroma.”

• Mrs. Huddleston, Mr, Lawrence, Mrs. Miller, and Mrs. Morey, teamed up for recess duty, where the kids attempted to build a snowman out of mud.

• Mrs. Scott, Mrs. Svendsen, Mrs. Voss, Mrs. Davison, Mrs. Williams, Mrs. Wyckoff, and Mrs. Poage participated in what became known as The Great Lost Mitten Search of 2025. They found:

  • 17 single gloves

  • 4 hats

  • 2 suspiciously sticky candy canes

  • 1 shoe

  • and absolutely no matching pairs.

• Mrs. Huff and Mrs. Carter tried organizing the office—which now contained 34 parent-delivered gifts of cookies, one poinsettia that had already died, and a student who walked in to ask, “Do you have any wrapping paper? I forgot my mom’s present.”

• Mrs. Russell and Mrs. Hickock were sorting the nurse’s office supplies when three kids showed up claiming “possible frostbite,” even though it was 48 degrees outside.

• Mrs. Cashatt and Mrs. Merritt heroically shoveled absolutely no snow whatsoever but looked very offical doing it.

• Mrs. Schweizer, Deputy Resler, and Mrs. Spafford navigated the car line, where one parent tried to hand off a full Crock-Pot of chili as a teacher gift.

• Mrs. Barsch, Mrs. Burkett, and Mrs. Tipton tried serving lunch, but the students were far too hyped up to notice the chicken nuggets shaped nothing like Christmas trees despite what the menu promised.

The Final Straw

On Thursday, someone (… probably Mr. Jones) plugged in an “extra festive” Christmas light display that promptly blew a breaker and shut off the Wi-Fi. Teachers stared into the void. Silent. Terrified. Students realized the Chromebooks no longer worked…

…and the school instantly transformed into:

✨ “The Chaos Who Stole the Wi-Fi” — a very Dr. Seuss-ish scene ✨

Kids zigged and they zagged, they ran all around,
They spoke in rhyme nonsense and leapt off the ground.
They twirled and they whirled in a loud rhyming spree—
“NO WI-FI? OH MY-FI? THIS JUST CANNOT BE!”

Paper snowflakes were flying, pencils fell with a clatter,
A kindergartner yelled, “My brain’s getting flatter!”
It was wild, it was wacky, it was Seuss-ish delight—
A full-on Whoville-level meltdown of might.

But They Made It.

By Friday afternoon, the ACES staff gathered in the hallway, exhausted but victorious.
Superintendent Grimes rang a tiny jingle bell and announced:

“We did it. We survived the week. Merry Christmas, everyone. Please go home and nap immediately… before the glitter starts falling again.”

And with that, the staff of Avenue City School walked out—covered in glitter, candy-cane sticky, emotionally drained, but full of Christmas spirit and the unshakable pride of knowing:

It takes a whole who-village to make elementary school magical…
and it takes this village to make it hilarious.

🎄😂 Merry Christmas from the ACES crew — the bravest elves in education! 🎄😂